Taking Offense

Complaints and taking offense seem a way of life in our modern world. Every day you may hear or say "Can you believe she did that?" "Oh, I was so mad when..." "I can't believe he thinks he can treat me that way." "Listen to what he said to me" etc. etc. I can get offended pretty easily sometimes, especially if I feel unappreciated or wrongly accused. But, from scripture I can see that taking offense is a step too far in the wrong direction.

 I remember a year or so ago, I was having a discussion with another believer, who had a much different faith than I did. I shared my opinions, possibly with a bit too much vehemence, and so this friend told me I was being judgmental. Right away, I felt offended. How dare she, right? Me - judgmental, no way. I even thought of not talking to her again...in pure dramatic fashion. Then, I realized, as much as her words hurt my pride, I needed to hear them. Of course the Lord wants us to share our faith, but in a loving way to encourage and inspire others, not to simply state I am right and you are wrong.  At times offense can be selfish, it can be a peacock's show of pride. It can even weaken or harm a relationship, when it turns into blame or disgust. But, Ephesians 4:29 says, "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up." The next time I am offended, I pray I can have the spiritual maturity to overcome it and respond in love. Whether it is from deserved criticism, or an undeserved harsh word, I pray I can turn that other cheek...for my own soul's sake.

The Bible also speaks of being offended in God. When we complain about our lives, about what God has given us, we could be taking offense with what God has done for us. Complaining about something that isn't the way you might want it to be might show a lack of faith. To find fault with what the Lord has done in your life so far is a testament of unbelief in what God can do, his true plan, his love for you to do for you as a loving father would. Instead, faith is shown when a person, possibly distraught, upset, hurt, sick, or afflicted in anyway, turns to God in prayer, in faith that the Lord will give you all the desires of your heart and has a plan for your life, faith in the Lord's will.


Luke 7:23 says, "And blessed is he, whosoever shall not be offended in me."
Job was stripped of all the things in this world that gave him joy. His friends showed a wavering faith. In reply, Job 9:4 says, "His wisdom is profound, his power vast. Who can prosper if they harden their hearts against God?" (MSG)

Proverbs 29: 11 says, "A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control."

One way, I hope to instill this loving demeanor that is slow to take offense is in my partnership and union in marriage. At times, Kyle and I bicker and at times we find offense with one another. I try to speak my concern with him so that it can quickly be resolved.

But other times when I just swallow my offense, whether it be with Kyle or someone else, I don't think it goes away, but sits in my heart. Instead, I hope to learn to not take offense or kick the offense out with a showing of love. It will probably make me a much happier person.

P.S. I am not saying that you shouldn't take offense to all things. I thought about it and there are definitely injustices, hurtful demeanor, and plain evilness that we should take offense to, stand up to, and possibly attempt to stop or overcome. Just thought I should say that.